877-WedAug12

comedy4cast #877

Odd News Times Twos for August 12, 2026

"The Bear Facts"

Written by

Clinton Alvord

CAST

(in order of appearance, where possible, otherwise by actor)

ID ANNOUNCER.......................COMPUTER
CLINTON............................CLINTON ALVORD

INTRO: COMEDY4CAST STUDIO

MUSIC: COMEDY4CAST NETWORK ID STING

ID ANNOUNCER

The comedy4cast network. Let's dog ear that for now.

MUSIC: ID MUSIC UP AND OUT.

CLINTON

This is comedy4cast, episode 877, "The Bear Facts".

MUSIC: OPENING THEME MUSIC IN AND UNDER.

CLINTON (cont'd)

It's time, once again, for the August Dog Days of Podcasting challenge. For more information and to hear shows from all the participants, go to dogdaysofpodcasting.com.

comedy4cast is taking this opportunity to provide you with some interesting, yet totally useless Odd News. In fact, TWO Odd News stories that we thing deserve each other. So, let's have some fun with "Odd News Times Twos"!

MUSIC: INTRO THEME MUSIC UP AND OUT.

SFX: TRANSITION WHOOSH.

STORIES NUMBER 1 AND 2 ARE COMBINED.

CLINTON

For our first story, we're off to
Tenancingo, Mexico.

SFX: ELECTRONIC WHOOSH.

CLINTON (cont'd)

This is the home of Mayor Nancy
Nápoles. She should be home any minutes. Oh, here comes her car now.

SFX: CAR STOPS. DOORS OPEN.

CLINTON (cont'd)

I see her mother is with her. And her sister was driving. Well, I guess chauffeuring would be more appropriate since she's driving the...

SFX: SHUFFLILNG CLOTH.

SFX: DOOR SHUTS.

CLINTON (cont'd)

Hang on. Where did those people come from? They're forcing the mayor into that car.

SFX: CAR DRIVES OFF.

CLINTON (cont'd)

I apologize. I had no idea we'd witness an actual kidnapping today. This is...It's disturbing. Let's let the police handle this for now. I'll whisk us off to our second story, at Lake Arrowhead, California.

SFX: ELECTRONIC WHOOSH.

CLINTON (cont'd)

Let's try to clear our heads and see what's going on here. Oh. Someone appears to have left their Rolls-Royce Ghost parked with the window open. They should know better. Thieves could easily...wait. Is that a bear?!

It's getting into the car!

SFX: RIPPING CLOTH.

CLINTON (cont'd)

Ooh! That's gonna leave a mark. Well at least that Mercedes Benz over there will be fine.

SFX: RIPPING CLOTH.

CLINTON (cont'd)

Ohh! But that OTHER Mercedes over there will be...

SFX: RIPPING CLOTH.

CLINTON (cont'd)

No!!!!! My apologies again. That's two horrible incidents in one day. Or four if you count each car separately.

Anyway, days later, insurance claims were filed. Fortunately, there was security footage submitted. That should help.

It sure did. The insurance company shared the footage with a California Department of Fish and Wildlife biologist. After all, if there's a bear out there doing damage, something should be done.

The problem is, the biologist reviewed the footage and said that it was clearly not a bear. It was a person in a bear suit. And no, I don't mean they were naked.

After executing a search warrant, detectives found the bear costume right there in the suspects’ home. Which probably means it wasn't a rental. Makes you wonder.

An investigation concluded that the group staged attacks to solicit nearly $142,000 from insurance providers. And the three have since been sentenced to two years of probation and 180 days in a weekend jail program.

No word on the whereabouts of the bear suit.

Now, I'm sure you're as anxious as I am to find out if Mayor Nancy Nápoles is okay. So, back to Tenancingo, Mexico!

SFX: ELECTRONIC WHOOSH.

CLINTON (cont'd)

Ah! There's the Mayor! Safe and sound. Thank goodness.

I see that she's in court? To testify as a witness, no doubt. No. She seems to be a defendant. What's going on?

Actually, if they don't turn this one into a movie, Hollywood is missing out. Here's a rundown, based on information from the Attorney General's Office of the State of Mexico.

Nápoles was sworn in as Mayor in late 2024. Allegedly, while in office she coordinated an embezzlement scheme resulting in a municipal shortfall of 20 million Mexican pesos -- roughly $1.2 million U.S.

Fast forward to a little more than a year later -- January of 2026. Mayor Nápoles's husband and her brother-in-law came up with a plan: cover up the deficit by simulating Nápoles' kidnapping and demand a ransom of 40 million pesos, which would come from the municipal treasury.

The brother-in-law spoke with a friend of his and offered him half a million pesos to help with the plan. The friend agreed, then turned around and invited his girlfriend into the scheme. Oh, and his girlfriend's brother, too. Because, oh, heck, why not?

That brings us up to where we came in. The girlfriend and her brother pretended to forcibly kidnap the Mayor.

Making their escape, Nápoles allegedly directed her "captors" along specific routes to avoid security cameras.

Unfortunately, the rest of Nápoles' family wasn't in on any of this and, quite reasonably, they called the police, sparking a massive search for the Mayor.

Realizing everything was getting out of contro -- a little late for that -- Nápoles instructed the driver to drop her off on a dirt road.

Nápoles contacted authorities, claiming she escaped her armed captors. She was "rescued" by her husband and the Municipal Public Security Director.

Within days, police traced and arrested the friend, girlfriend and her brother at a hotel where they had been hiding since the kidnapping. And arrest warrants were issued for the Mayor's husband and brother-in-law, who became fugitives.

Meanwhile, Mayor Nápoles released a video message denying all accusations, claiming government officials orchestrated a setup. She publicly invited officials to audit Tenancingo to prove its financial health.

In early July, following a hearing lasting over 10 hours, a State of Mexico judge officially linked Nancy Nápoles to criminal trial proceedings for kidnapping simulation.

And scene.

So, what did we learn today? If you're sitting around and think up a plan that's dangerous, stupid and illegal. Congratulations. You've hit the center of the "Don't do it!" Venn Diagram.

OUTRO: COMEDY4CAST STUDIO

MUSIC: END THEME IN AND UNDER FOR...

CLINTON

That about wraps it up for today's "Odd News Times Twos". But first, a very special shout-out to my Patreon patrons, including Producer-level patrons, Paul Barrie, from the A Window to the Magic podcast, Kirby Bartlett-Sloan, Chuck Tomasi from the Technorama podcast, Kyle Nishioka, Brian Martsolf, Amy Murphy, and Steve Ng from steveng5.com, that's s-t-e-v-e-n-g the number 5 dot com. You, too, can support comedy4cast. Just search for comedy4cast, all one word with the number 4, on patreon.com.

Talk to you again next time! But for now, that's it. We're done, done, done, done, done. Bye bye!

MUSIC: 'END THEME' UP AND OUT.

=== THE END ===