1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:09,360 Music. The comedy4cast network. Let's dog ear that for now. 2 00:00:09,353 --> 00:00:18,328 This is the 2023 comedy4cast Podcast Spectacular, brought to you by the fantastic Patreon patrons. 3 00:00:18,832 --> 00:00:25,242 Thank you! Why not join Zach, Charlotte, Amy, and the other amazing individuals 4 00:00:25,395 --> 00:00:28,843 who support the show for as little as a dollar a month? 5 00:00:29,572 --> 00:00:35,018 This year's original 20-chapter story is called Big Shot. To hear it from the beginning, 6 00:00:35,306 --> 00:00:38,916 go to comedy4cast.com slash 2023. 7 00:00:39,323 --> 00:00:45,623 And remember, Comedy Forecast is all one word, with the number 4. 8 00:00:45,623 --> 00:00:50,439 Now, here's Chapter 12, A Cup Full of Danger. 9 00:00:50,480 --> 00:01:13,680 Music. 10 00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:19,003 Previously in our story, the mysterious stranger who is in Middling Fair looking for Danny 11 00:01:19,003 --> 00:01:24,180 Hillcrest headed out of the Venus Arms Hotel to get some breakfast, but before he left, 12 00:01:24,483 --> 00:01:29,419 he informed Giles that Cap was asleep in the hall just outside his room. 13 00:01:30,283 --> 00:01:35,388 While Giles took the elevator up to the 10th floor, Detective Haartte spoke with Abby Falmacher, 14 00:01:35,963 --> 00:01:42,363 making the rounds of local businesses, asking if they need any suspicious activity investigated. 15 00:01:42,363 --> 00:01:50,907 No, thank you, Detective Haartte. And to be honest, none of the merchants in town want to work with you. 16 00:01:51,340 --> 00:01:59,541 Not after the way you treated Wilbert Dunn. From the Middling Fair jewelry store and potluck supper betting parlor? 17 00:01:59,937 --> 00:02:04,483 What's the big deal? He wanted me to solve some petty jewelry theft. 18 00:02:05,032 --> 00:02:11,793 That might have been okay back in the day, before I solved the case of the waffle batter sphere. 19 00:02:12,243 --> 00:02:20,063 So you keep saying. Their conversation was interrupted by Giles several attempts to get cap out of the returning elevator. 20 00:02:21,902 --> 00:02:27,432 As this chapter begins, Giles is giving his retrieval task one more try. 21 00:02:28,872 --> 00:02:31,272 Step out first, then talk. 22 00:02:32,111 --> 00:02:38,792 Giles helps Cap over to the front desk. Exhausted from their adventure, the two employees lean against the counter. 23 00:02:44,561 --> 00:02:50,710 Well? Well what? Oh yes, Cap, tell Miss Falmacher what happened. 24 00:02:51,016 --> 00:02:59,992 Okay, there was a ding and then the elevator doors opened and you came in. 25 00:02:59,992 --> 00:03:06,310 Not that. What happened last night? What Mr. Blaine Hendricks said? 26 00:03:06,472 --> 00:03:12,552 I got it, got it. Hey, did you know he gave me a 20 buck tip? I don't have to split it with you, 27 00:03:12,552 --> 00:03:19,192 do I? Because you didn't do bupkis. Anyway, I heard him talking on his phone. 28 00:03:19,940 --> 00:03:28,285 Remember when we had phones in the rooms? Five dollars for a local call, please! Cap! Oh, yeah. 29 00:03:28,872 --> 00:03:36,396 He said that even if Danny's hiding, he's going to find him and take care of him. 30 00:03:37,112 --> 00:03:41,635 And if there are any witnesses, he'll take care of them, too. 31 00:03:42,512 --> 00:03:50,746 And then... And then the carpet looked really soft. And so I thought I would just lie down and... 32 00:03:53,572 --> 00:03:58,794 I think that's about it. I'll get Cap over to his comfy chair. 33 00:03:58,965 --> 00:04:02,386 This is very concerning. I'm calling the police. 34 00:04:02,692 --> 00:04:07,184 And what exactly are you going to say? That Cap heard something? 35 00:04:08,219 --> 00:04:13,494 His picture is in the dictionary next to unreliable witness and unusual ear hair. 36 00:04:13,719 --> 00:04:15,241 But that's another story. 37 00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:19,722 Then what do you suggest? Maybe you could buy him a trimmer. 38 00:04:19,722 --> 00:04:24,342 I mean about Danny and this stranger. 39 00:04:24,621 --> 00:04:25,935 Here's a suggestion. 40 00:04:26,251 --> 00:04:28,591 Why don't I shadow this guy and see what's up? 41 00:04:29,554 --> 00:04:35,559 My professional opinion is it's nothing, but it'll help me keep my sleuthing skills in peak condition 42 00:04:35,856 --> 00:04:37,971 and ready for a real case. 43 00:04:38,575 --> 00:04:42,653 The problem is he has a head start. I have no idea where he's going. 44 00:04:43,373 --> 00:04:51,484 Caprica Coffee. No, thanks. I'm trying to cut down. He's going to Caprica Coffee to have breakfast. 45 00:04:51,871 --> 00:04:54,419 At last, my first clue. 46 00:04:54,905 --> 00:04:56,192 You've still got it, Haartte. 47 00:04:56,831 --> 00:05:04,822 No wonder you solved the case of the waffle. Will you get going? All right! 48 00:05:04,822 --> 00:05:15,214 There it was. 49 00:05:16,330 --> 00:05:18,968 Capica Coffee's coffee shop, coffee bar, and coffeeXpress. 50 00:05:20,822 --> 00:05:25,665 Hold on. Look, I'm okay with you all doing your own voiceovers during your flashbacks, but now 51 00:05:25,822 --> 00:05:27,952 you're crossing the line. What the hell are you talking about? 52 00:05:29,102 --> 00:05:34,074 This is my whole deal! Oh, really? Have you listened to the credits? 53 00:05:34,342 --> 00:05:38,737 And as the narrator, Gary J. Chambers. All right, fine. 54 00:05:39,302 --> 00:05:41,374 But you can't use my music. 55 00:05:42,182 --> 00:05:44,084 That's okay. I brought my own. 56 00:05:45,040 --> 00:06:01,680 Oops. Wrong track. I'm new to Spotify. That's better. Detective Haartte hesitated 57 00:06:01,675 --> 00:06:07,184 staring at the sign, Caprica Coffee, he thought. Why did it have to be Caprica Coffee? 58 00:06:08,005 --> 00:06:12,954 The memories of a thousand sleepless nights rushed in like customers at a Black Friday sale. 59 00:06:13,630 --> 00:06:17,906 The caffeine highs, the sweet'n los, so many donuts. 60 00:06:19,365 --> 00:06:24,576 Hey, buddy, none of that is true. Just getting my bearings. You can go in now. 61 00:06:27,196 --> 00:06:30,383 Welcome to Caprica Coffee's coffee shop. The gaunt owner of the cafe looked up, 62 00:06:31,148 --> 00:06:32,525 from his endless, thankless toils. 63 00:06:33,453 --> 00:06:39,394 Through sunken eyes, he viewed the new customer as just one more hunk of flesh passing through his life, 64 00:06:40,285 --> 00:06:42,761 part of the never-ending parade of lost souls. 65 00:06:43,765 --> 00:06:44,381 He grunted out a greeting. 66 00:06:45,543 --> 00:06:49,525 I guess I'll just start over. Welcome to Caprica Coffee's coffee shop, coffee bar, 67 00:06:49,525 --> 00:06:52,915 and coffeeXpress, where every cup of coffee is just $2. 68 00:06:53,125 --> 00:06:54,995 Small, medium, large, extra large. 69 00:06:55,205 --> 00:06:58,506 Even our Caprica Coffee coffee cauldron is just $2. 70 00:06:58,805 --> 00:07:04,600 Would you like to try our new Rustica Quistador Cortana Brew made with robusta beans and a hint of poposity? 71 00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:09,489 No thanks. Just a small dark roast and a bagel. 72 00:07:09,831 --> 00:07:11,865 Toasted? Not at the moment. 73 00:07:12,305 --> 00:07:21,066 Haartte scanned the room, eyeing the seedy clientele a greasy spoon joint like this attracts like flies swarm to hot, weak old tuna sandwiches. 74 00:07:21,831 --> 00:07:22,443 Hold the pickles. 75 00:07:23,442 --> 00:07:26,818 To his right he spotted a well-dressed administrative assistant. 76 00:07:27,305 --> 00:07:29,429 To his other right, a crossing guard. 77 00:07:30,125 --> 00:07:37,153 And directly ahead, the worst of the bunch, a hack writer working on his cheesy audio plays. Hey! 78 00:07:38,062 --> 00:07:43,436 Finally, there, sitting at a dimly lit table by the sun-filled window, sat the stranger. 79 00:07:44,525 --> 00:07:49,009 With his steaming cup of joe in hand, Detective Haartte- But I haven't given him his coffee yet! 80 00:07:49,261 --> 00:07:52,429 Well hurry up, I'm on a roll! Here you go! 81 00:07:53,195 --> 00:07:57,045 Thanks. Sorry about the narration. Occupational hazard. 82 00:07:57,201 --> 00:08:01,685 Haartte cautiously approach the stranger's table, wondering which alias he should pull out of 83 00:08:02,017 --> 00:08:05,267 his private dick's bag of tricks to win the stranger's confidence. 84 00:08:06,086 --> 00:08:14,404 Right. Excuse me, you didn't happen to see a woman wearing a white dress come in here, did you? She had an umbrella. 85 00:08:14,805 --> 00:08:19,922 Or as I like to call it, a parasail. I think you mean parasol. 86 00:08:20,605 --> 00:08:26,764 Do I? Mind if I sit here? The place is a little crowded. Sure. 87 00:08:28,916 --> 00:08:32,765 Now let me ask you a question. Do you know Danny Hillcrest? 88 00:08:33,282 --> 00:08:35,765 Of course I do. Everyone in town knows Hillcrest. 89 00:08:35,765 --> 00:08:39,574 But nobody seems to know where he is. 90 00:08:39,925 --> 00:08:41,402 Do you? 91 00:08:41,789 --> 00:08:45,741 Listen, I ask the questions around here. Oh? 92 00:08:46,020 --> 00:08:52,725 The name's Haartte. Detective Hart. heart. Two A's, two T's, spelled right. 93 00:08:51,772 --> 00:08:56,391 Say it right. Detective? That didn't take long. 94 00:08:56,904 --> 00:09:00,721 Has Haartte lost his touch? Would I have used a different approach? 95 00:09:01,153 --> 00:09:03,935 Will I release my background music on Spotify? 96 00:09:04,574 --> 00:09:08,796 For answers, and possibly my pitch for a narrator P.I. T.V. series, 97 00:09:09,183 --> 00:09:14,251 be sure to come back for Chapter 13, Trouble Finds Detective Haartte. 98 00:09:17,574 --> 00:09:22,796 Like the show? Be sure to subscribe, so you never miss an episode. It's easy. 99 00:09:23,002 --> 00:09:27,796 You'll find comedy4cast a lot of places, like Amazon Music, Apple podcasts, 100 00:09:28,183 --> 00:09:34,527 and Spotify. Just remember, comedy4cast is all one word, with the number 4. 101 00:09:35,183 --> 00:09:41,750 And voice assistants hate that. In this episode, as the stranger, Grant Johnson, 102 00:09:42,262 --> 00:09:54,212 Voicegranted.com, as Abbie Fallmacher, Bonnie Kenderdine, and the narrator was played by Gary J. Chambers, garyjchambersvo.com. 103 00:09:54,527 --> 00:09:59,262 Additional voices, as well as story and music, by Clinton Alvord. 104 00:09:59,262 --> 00:10:03,214 Copyright 2023, all rights reserved. 105 00:10:04,052 --> 00:10:09,516 See you next time, but for now, that's it. We're done, done, done, done, done. Bye-bye! 106 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:24,750 Music.