The comedy4cast Network. Let's dog-ear this for now. This is comedy4cast Episode 764. Danny Makes a Trailer.
Brought to you by the comedy4cast Patreon patrons. Thank you. Oh, hi. Clinton here.
Danny Hillcrest just sent out a pitch to Hollywood for one of those Hallmark Christmas movies, and he did it as a trailer.
I tried to explain to him that the trailer was really too much, but he said, Don't be ridiculously goofy.
Everyone in Hollywood has a trailer.
I think they keep their assorted wine country vineyard souvenir mugs in there.
He also said it would be okay if I shared this pitch trailer with you. He said that before I asked him.
In spite of me making a conscious effort to not ask him.
Enjoy?
Beep beep! Rise and shine, kiddo! Ugh, what time is it? Time to be the first in line!
Black Friday, here we come! This holiday season. Now remember son, we want the 84 inch 4K TV with Built in Bluetooth.
Got it dad. There's something special right around the corner. Great. There's already a line Ash, because you had to get to that coffee. Chai, dad.
Maybe we should skip Black Friday this year. Get us a place in line.
I'll park the car. And remember, 84 inch 4K TV with the built in Bluetooth.
This is why I hate coming home for the holidays. And it might just lead to love.
Is this the end of the line? Excuse me.
Huh? Oh, I'm sorry. Let me just. What are you doing?
I'm not sure if chai will come out of a wool. It's fine. I think I have a napkin in this bag.
Nope, that's a receipt. But it might work. Here, if you dab it. Get away from me. Can you believe that, grandmama? He is cute though.
Attention everyone, I'm going to open the doors.
Let's not have a repeat of last year. Grandmama, you go get your things.
I'll get the 84 inch 4K TV with built-in Bluetooth. Good luck with that. I mean it, my doctor said no stress. All right, the store is open. Single file people, single file, no cattle.
There it is. Excuse me, I grabbed this first. Uh, I don't think so. I was on it, like, like.
Like hot chai on a wool pea coat?
Hello, Tim the manager here. Do we have a problem?
No problem. He just has to let go of this TV. Yes, you do. Why, aren't you two together? No. No, no drama.
Not here, not today. You two work it out. I have to go put out a fire in camping gear. Literally, I hate Black Friday.
You don't want to be one of those people who can't ever let anything go. No, you let go, unless you're one of those emotionally immature people who can't stand letting a bargain get away.
Okay, Ellie, my cart's full to the gills with Fixodent. Let's go! Not just yet, grandmama. I see you're finally talking to that cute young man. He won't let go, grandmama.
Oh, that's what your grandfather said. Right before he left me for that hussy, Agnes.
Hey, what's up, Ash? Todd, when did you get here? Come on, where else would your best friend since first grade be?
Are you bringing your girlfriend to the big class reunion dance tonight? You two are together, right? No. That's what your mouth words say. But your eye talk says something else.
What the hell?
No, just walk away, Tim!
Away! Go on, Ellie. Ask him out. Not now, Grandmama.
You have to take a chance. Maybe, maybe later I could invite him over to watch something on our new TV. Do you think?
Guess you're right, Todd. I think I am falling for- Good work, son! You got the TV! Who's this helping you? Your girlfriend?
No! I know you. You're Benny Graymore. You own the biggest meat unpacking plant in the Tri-State area.
That means you're Ash Graymore, his adopted son. You write that blog, How to Convince People to Give You Things. Is that what this was? Research for your next post?
Well, at first, I- Hold on! I recognize you too, lady! You're Ellie Dunsdome, internationally acclaimed website reviewer, you wrote that nasty piece about my son's blog.
Uh, let me explain. Oh, you can explain after I buy this TV. Thankfully, the store is going to close in five minutes. Are you two all set?
No. I need an aspirin. With a chaser. No, that's what I had for lunch.
Oh, grandmama, I'm a fool for falling in love with him. Nah, you're a fool for spending all day trying to buy a TV that won't fit on the yacht.
Now come on, my dentures are about to pop out like a Pez dispenser. Dad, I don't care if she did only give my blog one star, I'm... Excuse me, did you say yacht?
True confession time. I'm not just an internationally acclaimed website reviewer and successful cattle rancher. I'm also a multi-billionaire who believes in saving this crazy planet.
This TV was going to go on my solar powered yacht to help prove the feasibility of alternative energy.
That was quite a twist, Your Highness. Your Highness? Yes. I, too, have a confession. Writing that blog was just a passing hobby.
You see, a few years ago, I discovered that I was the long-lost prince of Moldavandaria. This is my last day in your country, as I am about to ascend to the throne.
I was hoping to use this TV to watch some American football on my private jet while I flew home. Believe me, I never meant to deceive you.
Son, I may be old and not your real dad, but I know what it's like to be in love. You have my blessing.
Didn't they get engaged or something? Why do I care?
Which one of you is buying that TV? Let us decide together. Yes, yes, whichever one of us hangs on, it's theirs. One, two, three. They both let go of it.
Nothing gets past you. Oh, dearest Ellie. My sweet prince.
I'm so glad you two worked that out. Now who is going to pay for this broken TV?
Okay, I mean it! This thing's expensive! Hello?
Well, this is going to mean another year's worth of therapy. Danny Hillcrest presents Head Over Deals in Love.
Hopefully next year on the Hallmark Channel. Or Netflix. Or Lifetime. Or maybe the Game Show Network.
Who knows? In this episode, the part of Grandmama was played by Bonnie Kenderdine.
Ash was played by Grant Johnson, voicegranted.com, and Ellie was played by Madison Hatfield, whose unabashed love for these Hallmark holiday movies inspired this episode.
Additional voices as well as story and some songs by Clinton Alvord, copyright 2022, all rights reserved.
Many of the pieces heard in this episode are from the public domain songbook of Holiday Music. My goodness, look at the time. Let's wrap this up, shall we?
Oh, right you are, Sir Patrick. But first, a shout out to the Patreon patrons.
Thanks to Charlotte, Stan, Zach, Barry, Amy, Howard, Crazy Joe Adventures, Chuck, Paul, Kyle, Mike, Steve, Brynn, Gary, and Darren. and Darren.
If you would like to join them for as little as a dollar a month and get episodes before everyone else, just go to patreon.com and search for comedy4cast. All one word with the number four.
As always, this is Sir Patrick Stewart and I'm Clinton saying, that's it. We're done done done done done. Bye bye!